(these were taken today, September 3, 2011. Levon is 6 days old! Excuse the webcam quality photos...)
It has been a long, but fun, week. I am one tired Momma. Motherhood is no joke! Long hours, but GREAT pay. Snuggling with my squishy little man is something I would never, could never trade for anything in this world. He is just perfect and sets my heart on fire with a love I've never felt before. Boy, is it something else. Patrick feels it, too, I can see it in his eyes when he's holding his little boy, Levon looking back into Daddy's with his perfect slate blue beebee eyes.
(Levon, 5 days old. In a sleepsack and matching cap made by Auntie Haley)
I have never felt as much joy as when baby comes off of my breast. Half awake, gazing into space with his sleepy eyes.. his squishy little lips and cheeks covered in my perfect milk that was made just for him, my beautiful milk drunk baby. It is the sweetest thing I think I'll ever see. I wish he could stay this little forever.
(Levon bf'ing at 2 days old. August 30, 2011)
We hit a few milestones this week. Last night (September 2, 2011) Levon's umbilical cord fell off. It is a wee bit early for it to do so, but it was so hard to keep the cloth diapers away from it (even the Kissaluvs with the snap down), so they did end up working it off earlier than normal. But it's fine and we have been cleaning it with rubbing alcohol and it's healing nicely! He looks even more like a tiny, old man with his new found belly button. It's an innie. Not long after his cord fell off, Patrick was changing a poopy diaper and told me "Oh, this should be all the poop, so, I'm just going to change it now..." To which I replied, "Ah, I wouldn't say that juuust yet, babe..."
(Late evening, September 3, 2011)
I could not stop laughing. I told you so, Patrick! And Levon is a pro pooper, it cleared the couch and landed right on Daddy, like a champ!
Last night Levon slept so amazing! He slept for, probably, 3 to 3 1/2 hour periods at a time. My milk is officially fully "in" so he always has a super full belly to nap on. I love it, I got the best sleep of my life, it feels, last night. The previous night - he was sleeping in intervals of about 1 1/2 hours to 2, tops. We are breastfeeding on demand and my colostrum was still switching over to milk so he needed more of it, more often to fill his belly. Let's hope he keeps up his new on demand schedule! I'd be through the roof, and more awake through the day.
(Levon sleeping on Momma's arm. September 2, 2011)
Switching subjects a little abrubtly here, I feel I just need to get some words out of my brain before they keep exploding onto Patrick like a ticking time bomb (which they have, over and over again, lately. All my crazy hormones are going back to normal, hopefully with all this psycho-ness Maybe getting them down on "paper" will help a little to control them in my head). Breastfeeding is rough. But breastfeeding is perfect and the best and most nutritious diet I could ever feed my baby. I will never stop until he weans himself and doesn't want it any more. But man, the first week is SO hard. This is probably one of the hardest things I have had to endure. The results are so pure and so perfect and sweet, but getting there truly hurts and is uncomfortable, new and strange, so different. Such a different feeling. The initial latch on makes my legs uncomfortable and my nipples hurt and it's just so strange. I hope it starts feeling normal soon. I would never give up for the sake of my child. Breastfeeding is normal and perfect and on top of all that other amazingness, it is perfectly FREE. My body makes it without question. It was meant to be. I just needed to get these feelings off my chest....
And now, without further complaints, I think I'll close for today. I think I just heard a wet one squeak out of my tiny man that needs attention here pretty soon. I think I'll wait a few moments so I don't have a repeat of Patrick's dirty shirt... Tomorrow will bring my week old baby, and his first weekly picture. Stay tuned.